Shelby Gallien was a family matriarch; the wife to a successful dentist and businessman and the mother to three beautiful daughters who God saw fit to pass to each the stellar qualities that she so admirably exhibited during her seven decades on earth.
Yet “Miss Shelby” was much more than a wife and mother. In truth, she and a dozen or so other neighborhood moms in our hometown of Savannah, Tennessee, raised at least 100 kids whose lives were touched in over a 20-year period from the late 1960’s through the 1980’s. It was a golden era for those of us lucky to have lived in and around Yeiser subdivision.
The Gallien family is well-known and plays an instrumental role in Savannah to this day. Dr. John Gallien, when he was fresh out of dental school, moved his young bride to this small, sleepy river town in the early 1960’s to establish a practice and began raising his family.
Mary Susan – who was born the same year as me – was soon followed by Jean Anne and Jane Ellen. Although they may not know it, these southern belles are why I insisted that my daughter, Mary Morgan, be called by her first and middle names. I wanted her to be as southern and pretty as the Gallien girls, inside and out.
While she had endured some health issues the past few years, Miss Shelby’s Thanksgiving passing was a surprise to most outside of her immediate family. Time and distance prohibit me from attending many funerals of family friends in Savannah and candidly, I’m not fond of funerals because more times than not, they are sad, gloomy and cold services as opposed to gatherings that celebrate the impact someone had on their family and community. Thankfully, and not to my surprise, Miss Shelby’s service was a wonderful example of how someone should be remembered by those who loved her and would want to show respect for a family and their numerous contributions. What a celebration it was!
Obviously, the girls and Dr. Gallien were heartbroken, as their wife and mother were gone. She and Dr. Gallien were rarely apart outside of his working hours, and the two daughters who lived out of town made extra efforts to return with their families as often as possible. Miss Shelby loved seeing her grandchildren. And seeing the Gallien clan altogether at church services or at a holiday gathering was a sight to behold! While there are no “perfect” families, they’re one of the more ideal ones I’ve ever had the privilege of knowing.
Noticing all three girls were going to speak at the service, I quietly prayed as they approached the white pulpit at First United Methodist Church. Having stood in that same spot, I know how difficult a task it is to speak at funeral of a parent and expected one or all might not be able to complete their remarks as their mother’s body lay in front of them. Thankfully any doubts I had were exceeded by God’s laying His awesome and amazing hands on these three daughters.
One after another, Jane Ellen, Jean Anne and Mary Susan delivered their words with the same grace and elegance Shelby Gallien was known for. I’m not sure “grace and elegance” adequately describe Miss Shelby. Not that either word is not fitting – far from it. You see, I don’t believe the definition of these words encapsulate how she defined them. But I not sure other terms Jean Anne referenced in her remarks such as wise, kind, loving, beautiful, sincere or caring do either. Miss Shelby exceeded each so easily.
Mary Susan recounted some of the more memorable stories of their mom; of how she insisted the girls deliver their favorite toys to needy families on Christmas and how much effort Miss Shelby would spend on a Saturday night getting three little ones prepped for Sunday morning church. She wanted each to look their best for God. I know she looked her best as Jesus met her at Heaven’s gate.
Jane Ellen read a poem that although previously published, had to have been written with Shelby Gallien in mind.
“She tells me we mustn’t be sad
Because finally she’s pain free
She’s found her place in heaven
Underneath a blossom tree
“She’ll always be there to guide us
When we feel we’ve lost the way
She’ll always be there to comfort us
And wipe those tears away”
As her body was rolled down the aisle, tears swelled in my eyes as I sat beside two of my lifelong best friends, while the girls and their father sobbed escorting their wife and mother to her final resting place. In time, the tears they shed in earnest will be replaced by knowing their wife and mother is protected by Jesus and is being loved even more there than she was on earth. Yes, it was the celebration Shelby Gallien would have wanted.
I have such fond memories of seeing Miss Shelby and Dr. Gallien each time I attended First Methodist or ran into them at a restaurant or party. I will miss her smile, her gentle hug and her soft voice. I will rejoice knowing there are several other “matriarchs” in Savannah who had a similar impact on the dozens of kids that spent time in and around Yeiser subdivision over those twenty plus years. I am thankful to be one of those raised by these moms whose love and guidance made us what we are today.
Shelby Gallien was a true matriarch. A loving and supportive wife, a mother whose number one priority was to transform three little girls into young ladies, who in turn, were expected to pass those same qualities she deemed so important to their own children. To boot, she cared enough about her friends and her daughter’s closest friends to exhibit that same loving sprit to each and every one of us. May God bless each and every matriarch in your life too.
Paul, During the entire funeral I tried to fight back the tears during Ms. Shelbys funeral. It was the first time I had stepped foot back in that church since my dads funeral almost 2 years to the day. Tonight I could not hold back the tears thinking of her, her family and our families and the days of yesteryear. We, who grew up in the Yeiser subdivision were truly blessed by great people in a special time in our lives. We can and will always carry that with us no matter where we go or what we do for the rest of our lives. Thank-you for those heart felt words. Mark Garey
Mark, I felt the same way and could tell the service was pull on your heart chords too. I was a pleasure to sit in those pews with you and Jeff and for many moments during the service I felt as if it we were taken back in time. It’s a joy to hold such fond memories of those truly golden years.
Paul–your beautiful post made me smile and break down in tears. Her family and your friends were truly blessed to grow up being able to run through the neighborhood knowing each Mom was keeping a watchful eye of each of you! Shelby was one of the most precious women I have ever known. Our blessing is that she left us three incredible daughters that have learned from the best set of parents ever on how to raise another generation of fine women! This family means the world to me and I pray they each find comfort, strength, and happiness in the days ahead. Thank you for finding the perfect words we all enjoyed reading!
Thank you for writing this, Paul. You have such a great way with words to show how the entire Yeiser Subdivision of the 1960’s to the 1980’s feel. I can easily say that each one of the mothers (and fathers) that raised the neighborhood kids are special people in my heart. We were blessed to have our”village” of families that looked out for each other’s children and treated them and loved them as their own. So many stories come to my mind as I think of the good ole days. The days without all the technology, when we went outside and rode bikes, played hide and seek and kick the can, rode our sleds down Freeman hill, and had kool-aid stands. Our parents didn’t have to worry about where we were because they knew we would be home as the sun went down. I remember sneaking out at night and meeting on Hopper hill. We didn’t do anything. It was just to say we were brave enough to sneak out. Doors were never locked. We went in and out of each other’s houses as we pleased. We were blessed children. To all my “other” parents (who have passed and the parents we still have here with us) thank you for raising us the way you did. I love you all and I cherish the memories that you have given me.
Mrs. Shelby was everything her children and grandchildren said she was as Paul described. The funeral was beautiful and a true celebration of what a lovely lady she was. You are missed Mrs. Shelby. We all loved you very much.
Carol, I too fondly recall those memories. In fact, I have so many I recall places and events each time I run into someone we grew up with. I have even remember the smells and sounds from many of those moments. And it wasn’t just our own parents who looked out after us; one of the other moms or dads would not hesitate for a second to correct us and “straighten us out,” not did they hesitate to compliment, love and protect us. It was indeed a great era and I also wish the kids of today could share similar experiences minus the technology that consumes them.
I was thinking of Dr Gallien and Mrs Shelby as I was eating out last night thinking that he wouldn’t have his bride to share a meal with any more! They were a lovely couple and an example of the true American family and represented all things good!! Was an honor to know them.
Paul, simply beautiful & moving, thanks.
LOVE/PEACE
Thank you my friend.
As I read the words of my brothers and sisters, in blood and in that spirit that takes over folks who grow up together, my heart is full to overflowing with the love and security we took so much for granted. I think I was in college before I realized how blessed I was to have had many “mamas and daddies” who loved me as much as my “real” parents did. They loved and communicated with each other too, though sometimes we wished they didn’t… They took parenting seriously and did not hesitate to hug us, or to give us a “good talking to”. There were so many things I took for granted that I came to see were gifts of love. Providing care for people who had not been blessed with the genuine care we grew up with continuously jolted me into disbelief, and made me realize not everybody grew up in that loving secure environment. Even today I look for guidance and reassurance from my “other parents”. Miss Shelby’s sweet smile and gentle voice ring in my ears as I write this, wrapping me in a blanket of love and comfort even as my heat grieves. I will be forever grateful that God dropped me in the midst of that tight knit group of families and in a time when we were not afraid to show how much we cared.
Well said Streetie. We are a blessed group to be raised in such a great neighborhood.